An Angry Therapist’s Guide to a Meaningful Life

My guest this week is John Kim. He’s a licensed marriage and family therapist and one of the the pioneers of the online life coaching movement.

Interestingly, he calls himself the “Angry Therapist.” It’s essentially an admission that, while he was a licensed therapist and life coach, he was no better off than the people he was helping — and admission that probably made him a more empathetic therapist.  

More to the point of our conversation, John is the author of a new book called, I USED TO BE A MISERABLE F*CK: An Everyman’s Guide to a Meaningful Life which we dug right into. 

John lays out 66 Dos and Don’ts in the book, some of which are listed below. The ones in bold we actually had time to talk about, and you can see exactly where in the conversation those came up. 

John was a lot of fun to talk to. So, please click play above and give enjoy the dialogue. But, be warned, I will fully pronounce the title of his book several times. 🙂

John’s 66 Do’s and Don’t include:

  • Do be vulnerable 
  • Don’t be a douche, don’t be a bully, and don’t whine
  • Don’t choose passion over purpose (6:00)
  • Do participate in self-care 
  • Don’t get trapped in your bubble, don’t stay in your comfort zone, and don’t take yourself too seriously
  • Do go on man dates, and also do some things on your own
  • Do admit when you were wrong or when you don’t know the answer to something.
  • Don’t pee in the shower (10:22)
  • Don’t stop courting your partner
  • Do create your own definition of success instead following the definitions of others.
  • Do separate who you are from what you do
  • Do make your bed 
  • Don’t be afraid to fail
  • Do try to understand before being understood (11:55)

We also talked about:

  • How to respond and not react (13:05)
  • Going from Misery to Meaning (15:10), including how he got the name, the “Angry Therapist”. 

You can find John at theangrytherapist.com

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Paul Smith is one of the world’s leading experts on business storytelling. He’s a keynote speaker, storytelling coach, and bestselling author.

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